Ree Drummond – Have Book, Will Cook

Hello again! It’s only been a few hours since I finished the last post, but I have been hard at work in the kitchen all morning, preparing for our New Year’s Eve feast. I had originally planned to launch this blog on New Year’s Day… resolution and all, plus my OCD makes me want to start new things on the 1st… but I had a change of heart and decided to “carpe diem”. I believe that translates loosely to “seize the carp!” Or something like that… Earlier this week one of my favorite authors passed away unexpectedly, just one book shy of her promised 26 alphabet mystery novels. RIP Sue Grafton… I will forever wonder what “Z” would have stood for…

With that in mind, I decided not to waste another day! Today we kicked off the morning with a hearty bowl of… Cheesy Cauliflower Soup, naturally. Sure, it was supposed to be for lunch, but garlic and horseradish crusted PRIME RIB!!! It’s what’s for dinner. I’m not risking being too full to gorge later on that deliciousness! So Ree Drummond recipe #91 came up to bat, and true to form, it made enough to feed an army. Something to note if you decide to recreate this meal: you should plan to invite 14 of your closest friends. Or just cut the recipe in half, your choice! I should have known better when I saw that it called for 8 cups of chicken broth, plus a cup of heavy cream (told ya!), PLUS 1/2 cup of half-and-half… It was going to make too much for my little family of three. By the time I realized it was going to positively FILL my 8 quart stock pot, I was committed to the full-sized recipe. So here’s the deal: either Ree Drummond grows radioactive cauliflow-a-sauruses on her ranch, or the proportions are off here. The recipe only called for one head of cauliflower, but frankly this was water-thin until I “fixed” it. Hey, if you like thin soup, then this is for you! But when I think of a cheesy soup, I want it to be thick and have texture. It started out so promising too…

I started it last night, with the onions sauteed in bacon fat and tossed with the cauliflower florets until they were fork-tender… perfection! Then I drowned them. After the point of no return with the chicken broth, I added the roux, hoping that would salvage it. I used my immersion blender sparingly at first, then whipped it within an inch of its life, trying to thicken the soup to a consistency remotely close to the picture. And then I gave up. I decided to throw it in the fridge… ok, the porch, since my refrigerator is full and it’s about 5 degrees outside… Luckily Ree gave advice on this contingency, and said if you want to make the soup a day ahead, just stop at the step before adding the cheese, then put it in during reheating. So I put it on the stove this morning to see if it had improved overnight, and guess what?? Still thin. Plus, a little bland. Not a winning combination. I decided to withhold judgment until I put the cheese in (there’s salt in cheese, right??) and tossed those aforementioned bacon pieces in. I’m not a fan of salty food, but underseasoned food is just SAD. These additions made a big improvement, flavor-wise, but darned if it wasn’t still too runny. Then the BRAINWAVE!! I had several bags of frozen riced cauliflower in the freezer from an ill-fated attempt at a gluten-free diet for my son (long story short, it didn’t happen, after $500 spent at the grocery store on weird stuff like this). I microwaved one 11 ounce bag and tossed it in, mixed that with the ol’ immersion blender, then added a second bag without blending to give texture. Problem solved! The finished product looked just like the picture once I garnished with a little parsley and bacon, and it was universally enjoyed by both me and the kids. So the moral of this story is: only add about half the broth and call it good. Either that, or be sure to invest in a large stock of 1-quart Ball jars! Happy New Year! See you all in 2018…

http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/ree-drummond/cheesy-cauliflower-soup-3294212.html

“It’s so simple!” they said… “Just download the blogging software, it’s totally self-explanatory!” …Sure, if you happen to work full-time as a computer programmer! But I think I have it now, and if I am able to save and post this thing, then you will know I was successful, despite refusing to call technical support! If you are reading this, then you probably already know of my obsession with food, and also that I am a glutton for punishment. If not, here’s a little background: I routinely force myself to make food that I may or may not like, and that my children almost certainly won’t eat (to be fair, they are getting better about it, mostly out of self-defense!), all with the goal of putting myself through “culinary school”, via my collection of cookbooks.

This quest was originally inspired by the movie “Julie/Julia”, in which the modern day heroine finds purpose in her life by setting a goal to cook her way through Julia Child’s 524 recipes in Mastering the Art of French Cooking. In one year… Well folks, that’s nuts. No disrespect to Julia, but my life doesn’t need that kind of stress! Still, I loved the idea, and set out to duplicate the experience, but with a chef I admired, the culinary genius/science geek, Alton Brown. I purchased Good Eats: The Early Years because I enjoyed the layout, more like a cross between a high school science textbook and a Ripley’s Believe it or Not! obscure foodie factoid collection than a recipe book. I liked knowing the “why” behind what made tasty food, in addition to a good palate. But I needed to have some added challenge, if I wasn’t going to stick to an insane timeline, right? Enter my self-imposed rules of “No Substitutions”, and “Even if I Think I Will Hate It, I Have to Try a Bite”. Including the Panna Cotta Brain. Also, I had to make every, single recipe EXACTLY as Alton directed, because how could I know if his way was best if I messed with his instructions right out of the gate? From this I learned that while I still hate peppers with a blazing passion, there are recipes where I can see their value. Mostly they are just gross though… There were many times I wanted to quit (building my own smoker rig from a cardboard box, hotplate, cast iron skillet and hickory chips) or just take the easier route (how can traditional fruitcake REALLY call for 24 separate, weird ingredients??) but I stuck with it. Spoiler alert: the smoked salmon was amazing! The fruitcake still sucked… I spent literally thousands of dollars on specialty foods and newfangled kitchen tools I evidently just HAD to have in order to make certain recipes (food mill, anyone? I guarantee I’m the only person in a 50 mile radius who owns one.) I nearly lost my voice on numerous occasions, yelling “just EAT it already!!” to recalcitrant kids who wanted frozen chicken nuggets instead of the Squid Vicious – yes, that’s what it was called! – I had lovingly prepared. I de-beaked a squid, for crying out loud! I didn’t think I would ever complete the task I had set for myself, but after five long years, I finally accomplished it! I had made 155 overly complicated, mostly delicious, 95% successful recipes! And along the way, I became a more knowledgeable and much more fearless home cook. I had posted pictures of several of the recipes on Facebook and received feedback from many people who seemed to enjoy what I was doing, and regretted not having documented my progress better. After the trials and tribulations of working with material from a very complex chef-mentor, I chose my next cookbook for its simplicity, because as I mentioned earlier, I’m a glutton for punishment and decided to do the exercise all over again! My kitchen guru this time around: country living, downhome, good-grub goddess, Ree Drummond, a.k.a. The Pioneer Woman! Her food isn’t complicated. Her food does not require an engineering degree in order to build specific heating units. Her food requires butter, heavy cream, and stretchy pants. Check, check, and CHECK!

This brings me to where I am today… Almost exactly one year ago (the challenge was a 2017 New Year’s Resolution) I decided to cook every recipe out of Ree’s Dinnertime cookbook, but with the intention of photographing and labeling each one, and sharing my experiences along the way on Facebook. I hoped to finish it in one year, but so far I have only managed to complete 90 out of 137 recipes. I dropped the “No Substitutions” rule, but maintained the “Try a Bite” rule. My life was greatly simplified by this, and my ingredient-guilt dropped by at least 83%. Guess what? Peppers still suck. BUT… I found a couple recipes in Dinnertime featuring poblanos that I will absolutely make again! They were delicious.

For 2018, I have decided to go all-in on my commitment to my project by continuing to learn and experiment and most importantly EAT my way through this cookbook, and that is my (long-winded) purpose for this blog. I will start out by completing Dinnertime, then move on to a new Challenge. I have it in mind to tackle my Pinterest Food Board…lord help me!… and also get cracking on Good Eats: The Middle Years. You can bear witness to my successes and failures, and I will share the techniques I learn and thoughts on how I would improve or change the published recipes. I’m not attending culinary school anytime soon, but I can certainly eat like I am! And please… if you want samples, come on by, I always have leftovers!!

Tag: Ree Drummond

Happy New Year(‘s Eve)!

Welcome to my Kitchen!